


Touch

by intheinkpot



Series: Whumptober 2019 [21]
Category: Elder Scrolls Online
Genre: Best Friends, Friendship, Gen, Pre-Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-26
Updated: 2019-10-26
Packaged: 2021-01-03 12:56:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 798
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21179798
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/intheinkpot/pseuds/intheinkpot
Summary: After Coldharbour, Kavesh needs someone to ground him.





	Touch

**Author's Note:**

  * For [CrucioAndCoffee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/CrucioAndCoffee/gifts).

> prompt: touch-starved

It had never occured to Kavesh how isolating royalty could be until he observed the way Ayrenn leaned into Razum-dar’s little touches. When they spoke privately, he noticed how unusually handsy Raz seemed. Ayrenn had not appeared to mind so he had kept silent. But as he brushed a leaf from her hair on their travels through Greenshade, he can’t help but notice the way she leans subtly into his touch too.

“Everyday I’m surrounded by people,” Ayrenn confides when he asks, “but there’s always a distance between us. There has to be. But Raz is my friend. When we met, I wasn’t his queen. We were partners, friends, equals...we try to stay that way. He can tell how lonely being royalty can be sometimes. He makes an effort to show more physical affection when he can because I so often lack that closeness with anyone else. There’s always a distance that must be maintained with others. He’s the only one who truly knows me...”

Pushing aside the pang of jealousy, Kavesh understands. Or he thinks he does.

It isn’t until Coldharbour, however, that he  _ truly _ understands the craving for simple touch and physical affection. In the desolate wasteland of Coldharbour, he does not even have his horse for company. He misses the gentle nudges of his steed, the calm and soothing he gets from grooming and petting. He is truly alone as he searches the Daedric plane to bring this makeshift army back together, with no sense of time except for that it has been way too long - and when one battles has ended, another begins with the Prophet calling on him, and by the time Meridia spits him back out of Coldharbour, tumbling several feet to the cold stone floor of a familiar mansion in Auridon, it’s been far too long since he has felt safety and comfort.

He hits the floor disoriented and lost. There’s an eruption of voices and movement.

“Kavesh!” Ayrenn’s voice. Footsteps sprint toward him, someone hits their knees beside him. “Thank Auri-El, when Vanus returned and you didn’t...”

Ayrenn, he realizes. It’s Ayrenn. She gently tugs him into a sitting position as guards gather around, shouting words he cannot understand. He clings to her, trembling, desperate for warmth and grounding, the connection of human touch.

“Unhand the Queen,” someone says, footsteps drawing near.

“It’s alright,” Ayrenn says. “Help Urcelmo clear the room and fetch a healer. My court is done for the day.”

Ayrenn tries to pull away, but Kavesh holds her tight. She stops.

“You need to let go, Kavesh. I’ll be right beside you. But we need to move you someplace else where the healer can examine you more thoroughly.” She speaks gently, trying to pry his hands away, but he cannot let go.

“Please, Kavesh,” she murmurs.

He shakes his head. If he lets go, he worries he’ll come untethered. Words swim in and out of focus.

“Your Majesty, we need to move him...”

“Bring him to my chambers, I want to keep a close eye on his recovery...”

“...healer is here, your Majesty...”

“...cast a spell to sedate him...”

A hand hovers near him, and he clings tighter to Ayrenn. A soft blue light glows in its palm. Kavesh feels exhaustion wash over him. Despite his best efforts, his grip on Ayrenn loosens, his eyes slip closed, and he feels himself being pulled away from her.

When he comes to, he’s in a strange room - lavish and ornate - in some loose trousers laying in one of the softest, biggest beds he’s ever experienced. A quill scratches nearby. His muscles ache, and his mouth feels dry. The last thing he remembers is...

“Ayrenn,” he croaks.

The scratching stops. A chair scraps against the floor. Ayrenn takes his hand and sits on the edge of the bed.

“Are you alright?” she asks, handing him a cup of water.

He takes a sip. He’s tired of lying. He doesn’t have the strength to pretend...

“No.”

“What happened?”

Kavesh places his other hand on top of hers. He feels fragile and frayed inside, like his soul or body may drift away at any moment. Screwing up his courage and asks, “Will you hold this one? It’s been... Kavesh has... It was very lonely... This one needs someone to ground him...”

Without a word, Ayrenn climbs into the bed and stretches out beside him. She draws him into her arms. Kavesh sighs, feeling himself settle. Her touch and the weight of her arms around him makes him feel secure and grounded. His mind clears. Though he still feels fragile and frayed, he no longer feels the sensation that he may come untethered.

“What happened to you?”

Resting his head on her shoulder and drawing strength from her closeness, he tells her.


End file.
